Just
by twentyonereasons
Summary: It was just supposed to be fun. Just some stress relief after a hard mission. But this time it was different for the both of them and neither of them was willingly to admit it.


**Author's Notes:** This story is slightly off-canon. It implies that Ryder and Peebee get into an official relationship despite beginning a friends-with-benefits relationship. There's some smut but it's not my best simply because it was not the focus of this story. Ryder was kept relatively vague but this is part of _my_ Ryder's story. My Ryder is the default Sara Ryder because I thought she was actually pretty cute.

Inspiration for this story was derived from the following songs: River - Bishop Briggs. So Tied Up - Cold War Kids. Can We Hang On ? - Cold War Kids. Before the Storm - Young Lions. Hurts So Good - Astrid S. Secrets - State Champs.

* * *

Just

Ryder rubbed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose attempting to ease the pounding in her head. For hours she read report after report of an endless list of tasks she still had to complete for setting up outposts and finding Meridian. The words on her datapad were nothing but a blur now and even her usual glass of wine wasn't easing the pounding in her skull. _A whole new galaxy and I'm the only one who can solve its problems?_ Truthfully she couldn't do any of it without her crew and allies throughout the cluster but she was still the only one driving the whole thing at the helm. _It'd be nice if someone else could take the wheel every once in a while._ She thought about Kallo and wondered if he ever felt the same piloting the _Tempest_. For once she understood and made a mental note to thank him the next time she saw him. Kallo never complained but that didn't mean he probably couldn't use a break every once in a while.

Ryder set down the datapad on her nightstand and reclined to rest her head on her pillow. _Lexi is right, I need to rest more_. She smirked and closed her eyes. _Lexi would have a field day if I ever told her she was right_. In a way the Doctor reminded her a lot of her mother. Her mother was always nagging her father about working too hard and running reckless on his Alliance missions. _Mom… Dad…_ Remembering her parents brought on an overwhelming sadness that only added to her headache. She missed them both so much. She missed her mother always smiling at her and her brother. She missed the times her and Scott would be running rampant around the house playing some childish game and their mother always scolding them when they inevitably knocked something over. Their father would always pretend to lecture them and then shoot a sly wink and a smile afterward. _Those were the days_. _Everything was so much easier then_.

It was too much. Ryder moved to sit on the edge of her mattress. Everything was catching up to her in a giant wave of anxiety and bottled up emotion. She needed some kind of distraction and the alcohol wasn't going to cut it. _Peebee_. She needed to fall back on a coping mechanism she developed early in her adulthood. _When in doubt, fuck_. Let hormones take over and forget the rest. It wasn't the healthiest way of dealing with it all but it worked. She slipped back into her boots and left her cabin quarters.

She kept a casual pace on her way to Peebee as far as she knew no one knew of their arrangement and she tried her best to keep it that way. Her crew didn't need to know everything about her. _Who had the bright idea to put the escape pods so far away from the captain's cabin?_ The walk to Peebee felt longer than usual and she couldn't help quickening her pace a bit. When she finally approached Peebee's place she didn't bother knocking. She walked in without so much as a hello or glance in Peebee's direction and headed straight for the escape pod.

"Ryder?" Peebee acknowledged Ryder as she walked by pausing her tinkering for a moment until she realized Ryder's intention.

Ryder did shoot her a glance when she approached the 'bedroom' door more out of politeness than anything else. Small talk was not on her mind right now. She entered the pod pulling off her gloves and stepping out of her shoes before unrolling Peebee's sleeping bag. An eagerness drove its way from her mind to the deepest part of her gut. The anticipation kindled a growing flame in the lower half of her body. She didn't care about anything right now except relieving the tension and driving her troubles back into the bottle from which they emerged.

"Bad day, Ryder?" The door to the pod hissed as it opened and shut behind Peebee. She locked the pod giving the handle a small tug for insurance.

Ryder didn't acknowledge her question instead she approached the asari pressing their bodies together and pinning her against the door. Their noses brushed with their lips just an inch apart. Ryder dove in hungrily claiming her lips with force. Her bare hands slid tenderly across Peebee's exposed stomach savoring the soft skin. Her fingertips grazed across toned muscle and she felt a shudder from her temporary lover. She aggressively held fast to the asari's hips digging her nails into the flesh and yanking her closer. Gloved fingers of one hand threaded through her hair while the other gripped her shoulder. Ryder tucked her right thigh between Peebee's legs pushing up. Peebee pulled out of the kiss just enough to moan and Ryder flicked her tongue over her lover's bottom lip before biting down. There was an immediate response of grinding on her thigh and a hand clamping onto her right ass cheek.

 _This…_

Her tongue traced a path along her lover's jawline down to her shoulder. Ryder shifted her grip from Peebee's hip gliding under the jacket to palm a soft breast. "Ryder," Peebee breathed into her ear. She squeezed letting her open palm graze the nipple as she rolled her hand in circles. Another shudder from her lover, "W-what's got you so-" Ryder interrupted her with another rough kiss occupying their tongues to prevent any further talking.

… _is what I need._

For one moment the weight of the galaxy didn't feel so heavy on Ryder's shoulders. She could _just_ forget Scott wasn't in a coma, her father wasn't dead, and she wasn't Pathfinder. Right now, right here she was just Sara, not Sara Ryder, not the successor to the original Pathfinder, just Sara. Just someone finding a good time in some tucked away corner with a friend. A friend that indulged her in such escapades relatively frequently.

 _Just a good time._

Peebee's lips pressed against Ryder's ear providing passage for every soft sigh and rough groan of pleasure. Ryder's circling palm pressed in squeezing and kneading. The sounds of arousal in her ears sent shivers down her spine and surges of desire to her groin. She released her grip on Peebee's breast rolling the nipple between her fingertips. Peebee's hips grinded down on her thigh and she felt teeth sink into the flesh of her lobe. Any lingering anxieties and insecurities disappeared from her mind.

In an instant Ryder was pushed backwards crashing onto the sleeping bag with Peebee pinning her to the floor. Her eyes were met with green ones full of fire and lust. Purple lips crashed onto hers already puffy and swollen. There was a primal need in their kiss and it drove Ryder absolutely wild. She almost whimpered when Peebee pulled away but the fiery desire in Peebee's eyes kept her own arousal coursing rapidly through her veins. Peebee straddled her rolling her hips and a teasing smirk on her face. Ryder held fast to her hips and licked her own lips. Peebee knew just what buttons to push. She watched as Peebee peeled off her purple gloves and settled her hands on Ryder's. Peebee guided Ryder's hands from her hips to slide up her abdomen tantalizingly slow. Hips still subtly rolling she roamed both their hands upwards under her jacket and onto her breasts pressing down on Ryder's hands.

Ryder grinned, it wasn't often Peebee got the urge or patience to tease her like this. She needed this to be drawn out for as long as possible. Her breath hitched when Peebee finally removed her jacket. She wasn't given much time to admire the view before she was drawn into another kiss. The fingers of one hand toyed with a nipple while the other roamed across Peebee's soft, cool skin. She forgot herself for a moment losing herself in the kiss and exploring the body of someone she'd become so familiar with. Countless hours between tasks, missions, and reading reports were spent rolling round in the escape pod. The sleeping bag under her had become almost as familiar as her own bed. But she couldn't shake the feeling something was different this time. The skin she caressed felt softer, warmer. Nooks and crevices stood out more as if she were touching them for the first time. The sweet taste of Peebee burned deliciously on her tongue and she craved more. She craved the taste of all of Peebee.

 _Just fun. Just sex._

Unable to stand her desires she flipped them sitting up to remove her scarf and jacket. "Someone's eager today," Peebee giggled. Ryder responded with a last peck on the lips before blazing a trail of pecks and licks to Peebee's breasts. A hand clutched her neck when she took a pointed nipple into her mouth. She lavished it with her tongue alternating between licking and nibbling.

"Shit, that's it," Peebee groaned bucking her hips to try and find purchase against something.

Ryder would make her beg this time. Draw it out until the body beneath her felt like bursting. Her hand snaked down the toned, blue abdomen stopping just above Peebee's belt. She shifted her focus to the other nipple making sure to provide just as much attention. Peebee took initiative to remove her belt and tried to push Ryder's hand down further. But Ryder wasn't going to give her control this time. Peebee would just have to go at her pace. She took Peebee's hand placing it on her back and immediately felt a sting of nails digging into her flesh. She resumed her teasing running her hand just below Peebee's waistband and traced various patterns on the skin. It wasn't long before she got the reaction she was fishing for. The body beneath her squirmed and writhed with each movement of her wrist. She moved her face down nipping at skin and pecking around Peebee's navel. Peebee's breathing grew thick and heavy with need only fueling her fire. Whimpers and moans filled her ears with the sweetest symphony.

"Ryder," Peebee whimpered and shivered, "Please…"

Between Peebee's begging and the craving burning in her throat Ryder caved. She unfastened Peebee's pants the rest of the way and slid her hand down until she felt her prize. Already there was an abundance of wetness waiting for her. She lightly caressed up and down the slit still wanting to tease. Peebee gave a guttural groan of relief the moment Ryder's fingers made contact. Ryder couldn't help it she lived for the sounds of sex and ecstasy, she brought her face close to Peebee's covering every piece of skin in kisses and licks. Her fingers pushed into the folds slipping up and around focusing on no particular area just yet. Hips bucked against her hand trying to bring them both into a rhythm. Peebee's nails dug harder into her back clawing up and down. Ryder groaned reveling in the pain and gradually moving her fingers faster. On the next thrust Ryder pinpointed the clit her thumb making swirling patterns. Her middle and forefinger occupied themselves with Peebee's entrance.

"Fuck! That's it!" Peebee cried into her ear and her thighs became a vice on Ryder's wrist.

Ryder pressed a finger inside with juices making for easy access. She bit down onto the asari's shoulder muffling a shout when she felt nails claw from the tops of her shoulders down to her lower back. She was fairly sure she could feel blood welling up along the marks. But she couldn't care less, it just stoked her desire more. She worked her fingers feverishly curling to rub against the swollen spot she knew would bring her lover over the edge.

"Dammit, Ryder!" Peebee croaked. "Don't stop… Fuck me… Fuck me," she repeated over and over each time sounding more and more strained.

Ryder growled slipping in a second finger to help finish everything off. Peebee gave a sharp thrust and came undone under her. Ryder continued her strokes as Peebee's hips jerked erratically.

 _It's…just sex._ But was it? As Ryder felt Peebee unravel something roused within her. It was impossible to tell if the feeling was new or just buried. Every other worry that plagued her earlier was nulled but this feeling she couldn't shake. It welled within her the more Peebee's hips jerked, the more her ears were filled with sighs and moans, the harder nails carved into her skin making her bleed. _It's just sex_. The thought proved to be more hollow as time went on. _It's just sex._ She wasn't fooling herself anymore.

Peebee's climax tapered off with a sigh and her body went lax. Ryder lifted her head to find her lover's cheeks flush and breathing heavy. "You're too good at this." Peebee gave her a hazy grin.

Leaving Peebee's pants Ryder brought up her glistening fingers. An abundance of pride and satisfaction welled in her chest.

"You know," Peebee panted still trying to steady her breathing, "You're pretty quiet today. Everything o-" Ryder poked the tip of her middle finger into Peebee's mouth throwing a smug grin to mask the fact she was just trying to keep her quiet. Although she did enjoy watching the way Peebee suckled on her fingertip enjoying the taste of herself. After a moment she took her finger back wanting to taste it for herself. She sucked on her fingers unable to contain her sigh as the familiar taste filled her mouth. A tangy, sticky sweetness she never got tired of tasting.

Apparently it was too much for Peebee and in an instant she was flipped onto her back staring into bright green eyes. Peebee leaned in and purred into her ear, "My turn."

The whirlwind of emotion in Ryder's head dissipated once again as she let physical sensations take over. She focused on the way Peebee roughly devoured her breasts with hands and mouth. The way her breast was groped into sucking lips and an eager tongue. The growing heat between her legs intensified tenfold and all thoughts drifted from her mind again. Peebee didn't stay on her breasts for long before making her way farther down. Her pants and underwear were yanked with a greedy force and she was completely nude. She shuddered when she felt Peebee's lips graze her thighs blazing a path up one and down the other. She reached down trying to find some part of her lover to hold. Her fingers braided with Peebee's when she reached a hand splayed across her abdomen. To her relief Peebee didn't try to pull away, probably too wrapped up in what she was doing to notice.

When a tongue finally made contact with her folds Ryder gasped and bit her lower lip. Her eyes fluttered shut and she lost herself in a myriad of physical sensations. Her free hand reached down to grip on Peebee's crest. Peebee buried deeper pressing her tongue on all of Ryder's favorite spots. Peebee gripped Ryder's ass cheek with her other hand pulling Ryder's body as close as possible to her mouth. Ryder couldn't help bucking her hips and riding Peebee's face. It became increasingly more difficult for her to remain silent. Her breaths became heavier and more labored. Sounds of ecstasy slipped past her lips with each lick and suck.

"F-fuck," she uttered not as quietly as she'd hoped. It almost felt like Peebee smiled when she spoke. "Peebee…" she groaned from deep in her gut. Her head was getting fuzzier by the second.

She felt cool air hit her as Peebee pulled away. Her eyes shot open and she looked down. "That's what I'm looking for." Peebee shot her a sly smirk before diving back down.

It should have annoyed Ryder that Peebee was purposely trying to make her loud but it didn't. It drove her insane in the best possible way. Peebee wanted to make her feel this incredible, wanted to give her so much pleasure she couldn't contain it. _Or maybe it's just because I moaned her name. It's just sex after all._ Sensing the spiral coming Ryder bit her cheek as a distraction. _Just enjoy this._ So she pressed harder on the crest in her hand. Despite everything she was getting close. Her hips bucked erratically and she slowly lost control.

"I-I'm go-… Oh, god!" Her other hand shot down to join her other at Peebee's head and she clung for dear life. Her back arched and she came undone into Peebee's mouth with a sharp grunt.

Everything was so fuzzy she only noticed a blue silhouette hovering over her. A haze hung thick in her mind and her limbs felt like bricks. She willingly gave entrance into her mouth for Peebee's tongue when she kissed her. A delicious mixture of her own taste and Peebee's tongue. "You taste so good. Wouldn't you agree?" Peebee pulled away and licked her lips.

Ryder couldn't speak even if she wanted to, her mind still hadn't cleared its fog completely. Ryder just laid there while Peebee pulled her jacket back on and closed up her pants. She heard Peebee give a pleased hum as she looked down at her nude, glistening, freshly sexed companion. Ryder rolled her eyes. Feeling a little exposed she slid back into her pants and searched around for her other clothes. Peebee had already left the escape pod by the time she was fully dressed. She didn't say a word as she made her way out of the pod and to the door.

"Hey, Peebee…" Ryder paused at the threshold of Peebee's room and looked back. Peebee was already back at her station tinkering. Ryder loved seeing the look of concentration on her face.

"Yeah?" her eyes never shifted from her work.

A knot formed in Ryder's gut so tight it made her feel ill. There was nothing she wanted to do more than say her feelings aloud. _I love you_. She wanted to spill everything right then and there with no regret. She wanted to tell Peebee it wasn't just sex for her anymore. She wanted strings. She wanted every string Peebee had to offer and then some. But that door had closed a long time ago. In that time of zero gravity Peebee told her specifically there would be no strings attached. And she had agreed to it. At the time she truly did mean it. Between her new duties as Pathfinder, fighting the kett, and her brother-now her only family left-in a coma, it was all too much. The last thing she had wanted was to add more complex emotions to the mix. But the world was still spinning and she craved the comfort of someone to hold. Not just someone. Peebee. A bright jolt of energy when everything else drained her.

"Thanks."

Peebee turned to her offering a genuine smile, "No problem."

Ryder stepped out of the threshold and the door shut behind her. A buzz still in her brain from sex but a new ache in her chest.

 _Just sex. Just fun. Just…love._


End file.
